Sexual health is the enjoyment of sexual activity of one's choice, without causing or suffering physical or mental harm. Of course there is more to sex than enjoyment. Perhaps the sexual life is the great test. If we can survive it with charity to those we love, and affection to those we have betrayed, we needn't worry so much about the good and the bad in us. But jealousy, distrust, cruelty, revenge, recrimination… then we fail. The wrong is in that failure even if we are the victims and not the executioners. Virtue is no excuse
Once one understands that human sexuality is infinitely complex, it is easier to appreciate statistics such sexual dysfunction is a big health problem, affecting 43% of women and 31% of men.
Enemies of sexual health include:
- Disharmony in personal relationships, or simply too many relationships.
- Pain, or any medical, or gynaecological condition.
- Anxiety (whether or not related to fear of failure); depression; fatigue.
- Drugs (eg tamoxifen; the Pill; cyproterone; antidepressants; narcotics).
- A multiplicity of irreconcilable roles (if your patient is trying to achieve ascendency in her work, as well as being chief shopper, cook, housewife, mother, and friend, then the role of lover may be eclipsed all the more if she also finds herself in the role of being chief person to blame if things go wrong if the fridge is empty, if the money runs out, if the children do not get to school on time, or if her partner loses his job).
- Myths about sexual performance (eg that all physical contact must lead to sex, that sex equals intercourse, and that sexual relations should come naturally and easily).
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